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在职场中学会拒绝的原因

时间：2022-06-28 13:56:31 职场我要投稿

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关于在职场中学会拒绝的原因

　　You've got more work than you can possibly handle. Not to mention the time you're spending as an officer of your trade association. . . and as coach of your child's soccer team.你的工作量超出了你的可控范围，更别说做贸易协会工作人员和当你家孩子足球队的教练还要占用你的时间。

关于在职场中学会拒绝的原因

　　Your phone rings and it's Sally, another officer of the trade association. Sally tells you what a great job you're doing for the Association and then asks if you'd be willing to chair the Committee putting on a large event in three months.你电话响了，是贸易协会另一个职员莎莉，她先告诉你在协会做的工作有多重要，然后问你是否愿意管理一个委员会，要在三个月之内准备一个大型活动。

　　You know this project will involve countless hours of work, including weekends. You get a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach. Your heart tells you to say "no." Your spirit tells you to say "no." But somehow, what comes out of your mouth is "Yeah, I'll do it."你知道这个项目要耗费大量工作时间，包括你的周末。你觉着胃里很不舒服，你的心告诉你要说“不”，你的精神告诉你要说“不”，但不知怎么的，从你嘴里说出来的却是“行，我做”。

　　What happened here? How did "no" turn into "yes"? Maybe you didn't want to let others down. Or, perhaps, you wanted to be liked. For whatever reason, you agreed to do something that you didn't want to do. For most of my life, I lived this way. Saying "yes" when I really wanted to say "no." I'll bet you've done the same thing many times.你怎么了？“不”怎么变成“行”了？可能你不想让别人失望，或者可能你想让别人喜欢你。不管是因为什么，你都答应去做你不想做的事了。我生活中大多数时候都这样，真想说“不”的时候却说了“行”。我打赌很多时候你也是这样做的。

　　I know what some of you are thinking. If I say "no" to some of these things, I'm going to look bad or hurt my chances for a promotion. For example, if I decline a request from my supervisor, I'll be viewed as someone who isn't loyal to the team.我知道你们中有些人是怎么想的，如果有些事情我说“不”了，就是表现不好了，或者会影响升职。例如，如果我拒绝了上司的要求，他就会以为我对团队不够忠诚。

　　Yes, there ARE consequences to saying "no." You might not get the promotion. But let's not kid ourselves here. There are also consequences to saying "yes" when you don't want to say "yes." You become resentful and angry. You feel that you're not in control of your own life. You're not living a life that's consistent with your values.是的，说“不”确实会造成一些后果，你可能无法升职，但我们不要再自欺欺人了，你不想说“行”的时候说“行”不也会造成后果吗？你很愤恨很生气，你感觉不能掌控自己的生活，你过着不符合自己价值观的生活。

　　I'm not encouraging you to become lazy and refuse to go the extra mile at work and in your personal life. We all do activities that we don't particularly enjoy, like working through lunch on a key project or attending a wake after a long day at work.我不是鼓励你变懒，在工作和个人生活中不加倍努力。我们都在做着不是特别喜欢的事情，像午餐时间仍忙于一个重要项目或工作一整天后还要值班。

　　But I'm here to say that YOU count, too! And you block your own success when you feel resentful about doing things you don't want to do. Unwanted activities are not only time consuming; they drain your energy.但我这里要说的是你自己也很重要！你做自己不想做的事时会感觉愤恨，这就阻碍了你的成功。不想做的事不仅浪费时间，也消耗你的精力。

　　So, what can you do to help you say "no" instead of "yes?" It's very helpful to set boundaries, because that will help dictate your answer when someone asks you to do something. Even better, let people know about these boundaries beforehand so they won't be taken by surprise when you say "no." For instance, if you resolve that you won't work on weekends (except in certain limited, emergency situations), when someone asks you to help out on Saturday, you can decline and tell them you spend weekends with your family.那你能做什么来帮助自己说“不”而不是说“行”呢？设定一个限度会很有用，因为当别人让你做什么的时候这个限度可以帮你做出回答。甚至更好的方法是让人们提前知道你的限度，因此你说“不”时不会使他们措手不及。比如说，如果你决定周末不工作（除非是某些少数紧急情况），有人让你周六给他帮忙，你就可以拒绝并告诉他们你周末要陪家人。

　　For me, my exercise time on Saturday and Sunday is sacred. If someone asks me to do something during those times, I will politely say "no" because I value my health and well being too much to let other things get in the way.对我而言，周六和周日的锻炼时间是神圣的，如果有人让我周末做什么，我会很礼貌地回答“不行”，因为我太过珍视自己的健康和幸福，不能让其他事情阻碍我。

　　If anyone thinks I'm being unreasonable, that's okay. I feel better about the decision I've made because I'm being true to what's important in my life.如果有人认为我不可理喻，没关系。我对所做的这个决定感觉更好了，因为我信守生活中真正重要的东西。

　　You might think that you're indispensable ... that you have to say "yes" because the world will fall apart if you don't run to the rescue each time. What nonsense! In the end, you let yourself down and wind up feeling hurt.你可能会觉着自己不可或缺…你得说“行”因为每次要是你不跑去救场世界就会崩溃。真是一派胡言！最终你让自己失望了，心里不痛快。

　　Here's the bottom line: You're allowed to say "no." It's a small two letter word with the power to liberate you and significantly improve the quality of your life.总之，你可以说“不”。简单的一个字却蕴含着解放你的力量，大大提高你的生活质量。

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